Math

For some reason I'm on a math kick right now. Joey deVilla reccomended a book called "The Man Who Loved Only Numbers," the biography of Paul Erdos. I picked that up on Wed. along with a book on information theory. Today, I picked up A Beautiful Mind, the biography of John Nash, and The Man Who Knew Infinity, the biography of Srinivasa Ramanujan. It was also one of those days at work, so we ended up just blowing the day off and spent the last 2 hours or so before 5, watching the movie version of A Beautiful Mind.

There is something comforting in the lives of these men. Well, to be honest I haven't cracked the two books I bought today, but there was something comforting about Paul Erdos, and seeing Ron Howard's dipiction of John Nash. It wasn't the "movie quality" of the film that got my attention, instead it was the portrail of Nash himself. His mannerisms and the way he had trouble dealing with people. The way Paul Erdos forsaked everything that came between him and mathmatics. And I imagen what I will find in the other books as well. The knowledge that great men have just as much trouble with the world. That these great men were different and didn't fit in.

I've spent the last year or two jjust trying to come to terms with myself. Trying to accept myself for who I am. Not trying to hold myself up as some superior or putting myself down as some flawed existence. But, just acceptinng myself as someone who is different then the rest of the world. Who does not care about the things that others care about and who cares greatly about things that other people can't be bothered with.

I'm making great headway, and reading about these men is a great help. I just felt like writing that.